I used to desperately try to live for God. And for most of my grown-up life, I felt like I was letting God down. When you grow up Baptist with a strong earnest streak and a deep spiritual hunger, you cannot help but try to live your life for God. You will read books, hear … Continue reading What if There’s Something Much Better than Living for God?
I burned a pot of rice the other day. The rice smelled like cigarettes. The pan took about an hour and a whole lot of Bar Keeper's Friend to clean. (Bar Keeper's Friend is a good friend of mine.) Burning food is one of my wake-up calls--a pretty obvious sign that I need to start paying … Continue reading Distractible Me
Image from The Gift of Writing I'm learning how to listen to my heart. What does it sound like? Where does it show up? Ego, Intellect, Fear, Should . . . these parts of me are noisy. Sometimes they distract me from who I am and where I am going. When I forget, when I … Continue reading What to Do When Your Heart Doesn’t Know What it Wants
The best questions--the kind of questions that can change your life--aren't meant to be answered right away.
How can I feed my soul? What does my soul need? What wakes me up, the deep-down waking up? What makes me come alive, really alive? What opens up my heart? What prepares me for Presence?
A few weeks back, I wrote about finding myself living in the ellipses- the ". . ." - a time in-between what was and what is to come. I struggle with the slowness of this time. I have a feeling that I am not alone. Have you found yourself in an in-between time--that space between … Continue reading Leaning into the Wait
Tears have always made me uncomfortable. Especially my own. Signs of weakness or weirdness depending upon the situation. Brush them away. Hold them back. I've hated the feeling of not being in control--of my heart, mind, or emotions. And these sneaky, salty drops escaping from my eyes are tell-tale giveaways. They won't be stopped. This … Continue reading Listening to Tears
Pay attention. We hear it often as children. As adults, we probably need to hear it more than the children do. Children are usually excellent at paying attention; they just tune out what they are not interested in hearing. I wonder if Paying Attention is one of the signs that we are really alive, not … Continue reading On Paying Attention
“The trouble is, as soon as you sit and become quiet, you think, Oh, I forgot this. I should call my friend. Later on I’m going to see him. Your inner life is like a banana tree filled with monkeys jumping up and down.” ~ Henri Nouwen[i] It’s not just me? That makes me so … Continue reading Imperfect Silence
Have you ever had a life-changing conversation? One where somebody mentions something that hits you in your heart and you are never the same? Just over a year ago, a dear friend mentioned getting away to a cabin for two days of silence and solitude. Something in me opened up at that phrase: silence and … Continue reading Letting Go of Words