It is time for some deep-cleaning. Last week, I was an irritable mess. My house was a mess. I felt overwhelmed. "Don't ever buy anything ever again!" I almost yelled at my husband. "No milk? No eggs?" he replied. "You know what I mean." I snapped. I threatened to throw everything in the house away. … Continue reading Beyond the Symptoms: From decluttering to mindful social media consumption
This poem arrived last week. I'm just starting to understand why I needed it. Rumi said: "Poetry holds its meaning loosely, like a rock in a sling. We let fly. The rest is out of our control." I think I'm also just starting to get what that means. Just fly. Just fly. An eagle soars: held … Continue reading Just Fly
"It was going to be one of Rabbit's busy days. As soon as he woke up he felt important, as if everything depended upon him." -- A.A. Milne, The House at Pooh Corner "I'll go and see if there's anything [Christopher Robin] wants doing, and then I'll do it for him. It's just the day … Continue reading Trading Importance for Infinite Worth
Recently, I opened up a magazine from my alma mater to peek at the section of class news. I was happy for those who are making partner and who are accomplishing great things in the world. But standing in the kitchen in my pajamas instead of in a downtown office with a twenty-mile view, I … Continue reading Living in the Ellipses ( you know, the . . . )
You're fired. Both of you. Disappointed God voice and unrelenting critic. You may both go because you are not real, and you are not speaking truth or life. You make me wilt, shrivel up, and hide. Now, maybe a disappointed, angry God can transform your heart and mind and life into something beautiful. You and I may be very different, and that is okay. Shame, fear, and guilt--whether God-induced or critic-induced--don't breathe life into my soul. They might influence my behavior for a while, but shame, guilt, and fear are not transforming me or healing me.
The language that we use to describe God and faith and Jesus seems especially worn out sometimes. Sometimes I wish that we could just start over with a new vocabulary. But then there are times when we are given new eyes to see these words in a different light. When we experience these words in the depths of our hearts. And the words become new. And we become new. That is the power at the heart of these most potent words. "Believe" is one such word for me.
Am I selfish for staying home from church on Sunday mornings? This question hit me with force the other night. I love my Sunday mornings. I love them a lot. My reasons for leaving church behind on Sunday mornings differ from the reasons that I still am home while my husband takes our three kids … Continue reading Oxygen Mask
As I puttered around in that old flannel shirt, I thought back to who I was 20 years ago. 20 years ago, I was full of ideas and passion and ideals. The future was wide open. I had a plan and knew what I was going to be when I grew up. The plan was lost a long time ago and replaced with a new plan, which was also lost. Now I don't have a plan. The future is still wide open. This is both exhilarating and embarrassing. I'm letting go of the embarrassed. I am thankful that I am still becoming.
There are many things that we know with our minds and intellect that we really don't know. This knowledge doesn't change the way that we see. It doesn't change the way that we act. Sometimes we need reminders of the way things really are. We need help remembering our place in the scheme of … Continue reading The Practice of Seeing What is Real
I am being invited to live the story that I am in, where I am at, right now. Isn't that what life is? An invitation. An invitation to live with eyes, heart, arms, and hands wide open.
Jessica Sanborn 